*Disclaimer: Before writing this particular post, I ran the idea of it by two of my very good friends who reassured me I wouldn't be sending myself into an oblivion of embarrassment. So if that's the case, I place the blame on them!
I know I'm not the only one thinking about it, experimenting with it, or actually doing it. A few weeks ago, I decided to follow through completely with the idea of online dating, and I made my first profile on OkCupid. Now, before I get too deep, let me explain my reasoning. First of all, I work as a permanent substitute in a 2nd grade reading room by day and I attend 3-hour grad school classes Monday through Thursday by night. I don't have a tremendous amount of free time to lend myself to meeting people. Second of all, I am so over the bar scene. Third of all, everyone seems to be doing it, so why not hop aboard the online dating train? I know that sounds a little like, "If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you?" Well, this post is a testament to whether I'd take the plunge or not.
OkCupid seemed like a decent place to start. It's free and the profile is easy to fill out. After you complete your own profile, they supply hundreds of questions for you to answer, about love, life, jobs, intellectuality, and your matches are based on what you deem as acceptable answers. The more questions you answer, the more particular your matches become. You can "favorite" certain individuals you like, rate people's profiles, and you are free to message anyone and everyone you find on the site. I started with a pretty open mind, not particularly for finding love, but for a social experiment of sorts. Well, let me just tell you, that idea could not have been more of a backfire.
On the very rare occasion, I received a sweet compliment...
But that quickly turned into a FWB offer. Tempting, but no thanks...
Sometimes, the idea of starting a conversation was a struggle for some...
And for others, getting to the altar ASAP was the only thing on their mind...
Others just had a quick question...
And the rest were just downright bizarre...
Needless to say, it hasn't exactly been going as planned. I've received tons of similar messages like the latter, and not a single one of my messages to other individuals has been returned. What gives?! Now, before I go any further, I give credit to anyone willing to send a message on this site. It's not easy being vulnerable to a complete stranger, and my intention isn't to simply dismiss these messages I've received. But with the continuation of messages like these, who would want to keep their profile on this site? It's unfortunate that so many individuals have the ability to ruin the experience before it even really gets started. I've been on the site for about a month now, and if I wasn't so sickeningly optimistic, I would've quit weeks ago. I guess I'm starting to understand what "finding a diamond in the rough" really looks like in the online world.
So is this what dating has come to? Is this what I have to look forward to in order to find "the one"? I know some people are a real fan of online dating, but this introduction to it has only left me laughing/confused/frustrated/all of the above. Here's to hoping the next month is better than the last, though I don't see how it could get much worse. Have any of these same experiences happened to you? I want to know about them! Have any of your online dating adventures lead to something concrete? I want to know about those too! I'm open to any and all feedback you're willing to share. In the mean time, I'll just be here, reading messages about my hair color and buckets of KFC...Wish me luck.
xo Jessica
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